One of things I like to do when I wake up each morning is take my phone and check my Twitter feed. I follow Huffington Post and it’s a ritual to just see what interesting news would have come up while I was asleep. Today, I learn that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are getting a divorce.
It was a “roll-eye” moment because a part of me went, “It’s a matter of time, isn’t it?” I mean, seriously, were you expecting a long marriage out of those two? To me, it was common sense. There was just something in that union even non-celebrities wouldn’t be able to survive. Here are some of them:
1. He’s Too Successful and She’s Too Insipid
The film that started Tom’s super career – Top Gun
Tom – for all his couch-jumping, Scientology-promoting ways – is one of the most iconic actors of our time. Who hasn’t seen Top Gun? Who hasn’t seen Mission: Impossible? He may have made some questionable films (err … Vanilla Sky?) but his career has NEVER hit a low point. Whereas Katie is another story altogether. She was in a mildly popular teen tv drama series called Dawson’s Creek. … This is an actress who is pretty enough to decorate the pages of the tabloids but has a career that is anything but inspiring. Yes, she was in Batman Begins but was ostensibly left out in The Dark Knight (aka Heath Ledger’s final work …if you don’t count The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus).
So he’s been at the top of the Hollywood game while the likelihood of her scoring an Oscar-worthy role was close to nil. In a relationship where there is a power-imbalance, it’s hard for any couple to keep it going. How do you hold your head up high in front of your husband? How do you go about living when your “most outstanding achievement” is that of your husband’s wife?
“I’m already wearing flats. What do you want?”
2. She’s Taller Than Him
Like Nicole Kidman wasn’t a good enough example for Katie. Based on my observations of most normal couples, I can safely tell you that it matters to guys that they are NOT SHORTER than you. It’s a guy-thing. And, it’s also a girl-thing. I hate gender stereotypes but it’ll be really silly of anyone to think that a powerful man like Tom is a-okay with being half a head shorter than his close-to-nobody wife Katie.
Even in real life, women want to be with men who are more “dominant” physically. We want our men to be taller, to weigh more, to be fitter, to be stronger. It’s no thanks to our cavemen ancestors that we think like that. Can you imagine a scene where Tom and Katie are quarreling? What does he do? Stand on the couch so he could talk down to her? It’s just weird.
Look, Katie’s eyes are hardly the picture of joy
3. Her Eyes Aren’t Happy
One thing you can’t not see whenever you look at Katie Holmes since she got involved with Tom – her eyes are unhappy. Her eyes do not say, “I’m married to the love of my life”. Her eyes do not say, “I’m happy”. What her eyes do say? “I’m waiting for the time when I can get out”. When the couple got married five and a half years ago, there was a lot of talk about the couple’s prenup. Some of Hollywood’s most experienced lawyers commented how it is likely Katie would have to be in the marriage for a certain number of years before she gets a payout should a divorce happens. It could be she gets a million for every year of the marriage. Whatever it is, she knew she had to suck it up and stick with Tom for a number of years. And, after that, she gets to live a lifestyle she would otherwise not be able to have if she had never married the guy.
“Dammit! Kiss me, or else!” Don’t think it’s passion Tom’s hand is conveying
For the super-rich, a prenup seems necessary because the richer spouse needs to protect himself (or herself) from a gold-digger. But if a person is only staying in a marriage to “buy time” and wait for that eventual “jackpot”, it is a sham of a marriage. You hate the dude but there you are, acting the role of an adoring wife, because of some huge payout you will get in five years’ time. How can your eyes ever look happy?
See! Katie CAN smile!
But you know what? I’m pretty sure at the end of the day, both Tom and Katie got what they wanted. And if history was anything to go by, perhaps Katie’s career will take off like how Nicole Kidman’s career did after her divorce with Tom.
